yes, *that* Dawn person (dawn_guy) wrote,
yes, *that* Dawn person

I tell stories to myself

I started to write "I tell stories to myself to survive," and thought how familiar that phrase, that thought was, as though I'd read it. And because we have the store of words that is the internet (who lost her battle to retain a Proper Name some time when I was still a prescriptivist about it) I checked.
Dorothy Allison wrote in "Two or Three Things I Know for Sure"
"Let me tell you a story. I tell stories to prove I was meant to survive, knowing it is not true. [...] I am here to claim everything I know, and there are only two or three things I know for sure."
I am fairly certain I haven't read that book, hadn't read that vignette those words come from, but telling ourselves stories is part of who we are, so of course I would find a match.
I tell myself the story in which I have a purpose. Sometimes my difficult times have a noble reason of tempering my spirit; sometimes they are my reward for failing to be what I'm capable of. The path, the tapestry, the narrative are so much cleaner in the stories I tell myself than the begrimed, overgrown view from what we call reality: we edit, and I am a superior editor.
For now I read from others' wisdom and experiences, setting aside the task of telling myself stories for a while. There is work other than surviving to be done, and I'd best get to it.
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